Lebanon War, Poetry in Music, Abbado, Bashkirova-Co., Astrid Varnay

Dear New York Folks,

This is Jiwon.

I met one boy. (…)  Since his present situation is awful, it will be anyway very hard to get this eight-year-old boy to find his original himself. If his case is like this, what about the Palestine children, whose sensitive ears were wrecked either by Hamas or by Israeli soldiers?

http://abcnews.go.com/International/wireStory?id=2389821 Palestinian Teachers’ Strike Hurts Boy: The strike was widely viewed as a tactic by Fatah to pressure Hamas… Teachers loyal to Hamas said while the current strike was to force the government into recognizing Israel, they decided to undertake partial strikes, only teaching for half the school day… “The kids are in the streets now, and there are many women who have lots of children like me, their children are in the streets and are not learning. If the strike continues, I won’t be able to raise my children, they’ll go wild on the streets.”

Then what about their Jewish counterparts?

My problem:

I still can NOT figure out. I think I followed everyday newspaper. As far as I remember, something was noisy right after two Israeli soldiers were kidnapped. Then so many innocent civilians were killed, either in Israel or in Lebanon. Is it a war? Or a fierce fighting between Israel and Hezbollah?

If it is a war between the two countries, when did they start it? Was there an official declaration of war? Now this war hardly catches the local media in this town, although it seems to be still going on.

I read that the majority of Israeli, even those who used to oppose their previous wars, are supporting this Lebanon war. These are what I surely know about the current atmosphere in Israel:

1. Some Israeli soldiers patriotically died during this war. None of Israeli politicians will remember their names, anyway.

2. Some unlucky Jewish civilians died. The Jewish politicians will trumpet…

3. http://www.nytimes.com/reuters/world/international-mideast-israel-city.html?_r=2&oref=slogin&oref=slogin “Tel Aviv a World Apart From Lebanon War” from the NYT:

4. http://www.nytimes.com/2006/08/10/world/middleeast/10weddings.html?hp&ex=1155268800&en=e2869af8329e2899&ei=5094&partner=homepage “Israeli Couples Won’t Let the War Ruin Their Wedding Day” from the NYT:

When was it?

One night on the way home in my car, I heard a part of piano recital. I was able to pick up the classical channel, for no one was sitting next to me. And suddenly,

A very interesting Schumann concert, which reminded me of the definition of ROMANTIC or OPERATIC: “OPERATIC means grand, dramatic, or romantic in style or effect, while ROMANTIC means imaginary or visionary…”

This pianist has a clear wish to be born a ROMANTIC musician. (Is he HE or SHE, by the way?) In spite of his wish, he is not yet in a physical state to plunge into his imagination. Weird that he has an ability to reach his physical destination. Weird… I usually have to watch the performer’s performance to figure out his physical ability. Yet this sound “is telling” me that he is physically capable to be lost in Schumann’s imaginative world. A very weird musician…

What is the reason of his failure then? His nationality? Or simply his personality? Or something else such as his favorite repertoire, which is not Schumann?

One thing is clear. It will be very hard for this pianist to build this tiny part of POETIC muscles.


Do I even know what means POETIC?

Just out of curiosity… I pick up the dictionary.

POETIC -> POET: “one (as a creative artist) of great imaginative and expressive capabilities and special sensitivity to the medium”

POETIC -> POETRY: “writing that formulates a concentrated imaginative awareness of experience in language chosen and arranged to create a specific emotional response through meaning, sound, and rhythm”

POETRY in language.

POETRY in music?

I didn’t know that POETIC means bla, bla, bla, since all the critics used to praise a serious philosopher’s face as a poetic pianist.

One thing is clear. It will be very hard for this pianist to build this tiny part of P-muscles. To be aware of this tiny, tiny muscle fiber, he may have to change his entire life style. He may even lose his friends… so I bet he won’t make it. If he wants to know more of his possible ROMANTIC future, why doesn’t he study his friend-or-enemy, a Russian pianist A? He has what HE doesn’t have, while HE has what he doesn’t have. His Russian name was too long, as usual, to remember, but this weird Schumann sound is still ringing in my ears. Anyway…

Simply, the weather was too hot!!!

My problem:

The August sunlight is too strong. I never dare to go out exercising during the day. I neither want to wake up before the sun rises, nor want to work late at night. I am already suffering from a sleeping problem. I don’t think it is due to the tropical nights phenomenon, for I sleep very well, as a matter of fact. Problems occur after I wake up. What means this deadly feeling around my neck and shoulder, and these sleepy eyes? Sour eyes if not. Plus a painful spot somewhere in my backbone. I can live without Mozart or Wagner, but I cannot imagine ending up my life as Ms. Elephant’s legs. Plus this five months pregnant body shape! Then suddenly, I don’t know how to control my sleeping time. For some reason, all my previous exercises didn’t work. It was medically proven that my inner organs are healthier than months ago. So I stop outdoor exercising. (No “Voice of America” on my mp3-player means no wish to go out.) Even some of indoor exercises, which used to help relaxing my stiff neck and shoulder muscles, don’t work. I need a very, very specific indoor exercise, especially when I lost my voice while teaching my kids.

I remember I had the same pain on this very spot in my backbone when I happened to imitate BPO’s ex-horn years ago. It is happening again, followed by a deadly feeling around my neck and shoulder. Now, I remember one lesson from the female hornist X, who showed me her favorite way to maintain physical strength. Since her favorite mouthpiece is not same as mine, I have to remember her exercise in an opposite way to achieve the same result. (If I write more details, I have to write a whole history of her orchestra…)


It has been a week since I woke up with less deadly feeling. Now I want to resume outdoor exercise. Am I depressed? Maybe… I feel like being a human trashy: Messy computer, messy room, messy brain, messy body, messy mind…

I want to know. Exactly how many enemies do I have? In addition to the new(?) Wien-Berlin Wind ensemble members, whose bassoon proved the most comical performance during his ensemble with Barenboim’s adorable wife,

The celebrated wind soloists from Europe, including the bassoon professor at the Hanover Hochschule, where no one used to appreciate his horn player. (Hanover alumni still remember how poor his horn player sounded and looked in his chamber concert…)

And their Korean followers…

And then… Dale Clevenger. Funny that Matthias Glander believed that I would do nothing but obey Elena Bashkirova if he put the CSO’s boss into his toy-box. 이 새끼들 정말로 재수없음. (I hope to find someone to translate this sentence into the exact English… )

And then… the wind section in the Divan Peace Orchestra. The moment I heard of their ensemble, I wanted to throw away this group into the trash bin.

How many more are going to join?

While reading the Google Group, whose members were questioning the reason of Abbado’s OLD horn, I suddenly realized the reason of maestro Abbado’s farewell concert.

Abbado is not Mehta, whose favorite job is to amplify musicians’ XYZ except musical instinct. Listening to Abbado was like… to have a feeling that it’s impossible to simultaneously watch the back of the hand and the palm of the hand at the same time. I pick up his music for two reasons, and don’t appreciate this same music for the reason/result of those reasons. I also heard of his personality in public, which was never my non-favorite.


The reason of his farewell concert was my long time question, which no one was going to answer. By then, I just thought that Egoist Abbado was enjoying Barenboim’s tumbling as a Wagner conductor. When did this same Waltraud Meier appear as Abbado’s favorite voice after his BPO concert?

Then, I happened to read about Abbado’s official relationship with his horn player, and his personal relationship with XYZ… And suddenly, I understood how much maestro Abbado detested me.

Who else is going to end up his life as my enemy?

In these days, no horn players look miserable or sound questionable while following Bashkirova’s bassoon. They rather sound powerful and accomplished. One Korean guy cynically advised me. I am the one who failed to join the Korean professional music society, and therefore, I am the one who should shut up.

http://www.nytimes.com/2006/07/28/arts/music/28wagn.html?_r=1&oref=slogin&ref=music Photo: Astrid Varnay as Brünnhilde, and Bernd Aldenhoff as Siegfried.

This terrific torso and lovely neck and shoulder, which can not be built by the weight training. Even though I don’t know much about Astrid Varnay, I didn’t plan to study this female voice. I just wanted to study the GREAT Wagnerian voices valued by EVERYONE. Now, my curiosity starts the moment I find this old photo.

If Wagnerian diva’s facial muscles look like this, what about her German diction? What about her speaking voice? What about her volume while singing? What was her habit? What was the first physical symptom after retirement? Her lungs are proving more than inherited, then what is her reason? Who were her partners while young and what voices were her precedents?

I was not supposed to mention Waltraud Meier in my story. I am so sick of repeating to prove this common sense again and again.


Henry Fogel no more works in his Google home. Where is Meier’s fan, who used to follow me and insult my Forum writings?

Since I mention the NYT-forum in my writing, suddenly someone starts to praise Meier’s vocal techniques. It is rather in the Google-Group, in which Henry Fogel no more works and I find something valuable about the Wagnerian voices.

Whoever I am, wherever I go, whatever I do, I don’t plan to see Matthias Glander and listen to this fucking clarinet sound. Not to mention his ensemble partners. I don’t plan to watch Waltraud Meier’s comical singing techniques and acting. Not to mention her ensemble partners.

So… I feel free.

I heartily recommend Daniel Barenboim to prove his real musicianship in Jerusalem. A real musician can never lie during his performance. A real musician knows nothing but following the better sound around him, and then finally imagine his destination. Daniel Barenboim knows nothing but following Matthias Glander.

Now, Barenboim can do nothing without Glander’s directorship either in Berlin or in the Middle East. Can’t he? This is why it is not Daniel Barenboim but Matthias Glander himself, who wants to invite me into Barenboim-Gang to support his professional future. Am I wrong?

I will finish short writings about Daniel Barenboim and Waltraud Meier. And then finish my story. If I finish this, I am at least not a human trash. I may have to work at night to finish this short writing.

To be continued…

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